~ Hurts So Good ~

I guess you could say last night at work it got a little rough. Ok, maybe rougher than usual. Lets see.... I got my fingers smashed, My right forearm is scrapped, My right big toe got slammed into by a wooden pallet (damn things don't stop on a dime) and then the pallet ran it over. Oh and then I hurt my back and abs pulling out two pallets of liquid laundry detergent ( you guys have no clue how fucking heavy that shit is). At the end of the night all I wanted to do is come home because I had enough.

I leave work this morning at the crack of dawn (the moon was still up and she was breathtaking this morning) and drive home. Well, finally paradise is within my reach. Hubby opens the front door for me and I thought, " Oh how sweet."

The blimey turd wouldn't let me in though. He said, " No, uh uh, You aren't coming in here w/o Starbucks!"

Oh for christ sakes! Just shoot me now! So my tired, painful ass had to turn right around and go get Starbucks. I really should put him in a cage and only let him out once in a while when I have an itch to scratch! At least that way I'd get to come home and go to bed in peace.

So here I am drinking my Starbucks (I know I'm a traitor to myself, Okay I'm a blatant Starbucks whore what can I say?) and still awake. It's pay day but I'm not planning on staying up today to get my check. I need to sleep. Today is day 4 of a 5 day stretch and after last night I'm just whooped. I was so irritate and fatigued that a couple hours before my shift was done I got pissed off by stupid shit and thru some empty boxes and a stand for the rollers. They pissed me off and deserved it. LOL

Tonight Geo Metro and I get to work together which will be nice. I won't be all alone and bored out of my mind for a change. I just hope I'm feeling more up to the work tonight than I am right now otherwise Metro will be carrying my ass all night. And let me tell ya that it's a lot of ass to carry for one little man. LOL

We have a lot of fun though when we work together and we usually get a lot of frieght out together too. I'm just really getting to old for this shit. I know it's cliche but I'm tired so who cares.
I sure as hell hope that tonight isn't as rough. UGH!!!

~ 1,2,3,4,5, I Caught A Fish ALive! ~

Yesterday Since the men in my house woke me up after only 5 hours of sleep the Hubby decided that he wanted to take Bubba and me fishing before I had to go to work. So we went to a lake about 30 mins from us. It was Bubba's first time fishing. He's been wanting to Fish since he was 3. The boy did great! He caught over a dozen Bullheads! Unfortunatly, without a boat the only thing close to shore to catch is bullheads this time of year when it's so hot. He didn't care though and was tickled pink. We were so happy for him. He loved it so much. I even caught a couple fish before I had to cut my line cause I caught it in a tree. LOL Hubby caught a few too. I would say that between the 3 of us we caught 20 bullheads in an hour and a half of fishing. They were really hungry and we had some big, fat, juicy worms. Yes, I can put a worm on a hook and it don't gross me out but it does gross me out to have my hands dirty. It was driving me nuts. Hubby taught me how to tie a hook on my line though. So, I did learn something new. Next time though I'm bringing wipes for my hands and sanatizer. Bubba really needs to work on his casting. Hubby and I ended up casting his line most of the time which didn't bother me at all. It's a difficult thing for Bubba right now. Wish we would of got a pic of him with one of his catches but we forgot. We were pretty busy with all those hungry bullheads. LOL

Shaggy had to work so he wasn't able to go with us. He was pretty bummed cause he loves to fish. Hopefully before the fishing season is over we will be able to go fishing again but as a whole family. Maybe even get our hands on a boat so we can do some real fishing and NOT just catch some bullheads.

~ The Gift of Sisterhood ~

This is for my sister(s).


I once had a sister
By blood we were bound
In the mist of my grief there was a gift that I found.
It’s nothing you can touch
It’s nothing you can see.
But it’s worth much more than gold to me.

What I found was a New Sister.
Who would of thought it? Who knew?
That in the mist of my grief I would find YOU!
You have been a blessing to me.
You share my laughter, my tears, and my strife.
You even cheer me on thru life.

You’re my cheerleader, my sister, my friend.
Thank you for being there when I needed you most.
When I’m wheeling and dealing with my personal Ghost.
I may not always show it,
I may not always be there
But know that I will always love you and care.


~TopaazMoons~

~ If This Is A Dream ~

If this is a Dream
Allow me to linger here.
Where my heart dances
To a tune unknown to me.
Where my heart can waltz
Unbridled under the moonlight,
Where no one else can see.

For if this is a dream
It is the most precious to me.
For my heart spins and whirls
With every sweet memory.
For time is much to short,
Just a fleeting blink of an eye.
Yet, for this brief moment, you shall be...
Forever mine!

~ TopaazMoons~

~ Can You Smell My Brain A Cooking? ~

The other day I was doing my usual online news surfing and reading when I came upon a blog by Neale Donald Walsch via belief net. I admit that I have never heard of this man before but I figured what the heck and gave his blog a look and read. I was reading the posts in his blog when I cam upon his definition of Morality.

“Morality is the desire to force others to behave as we have not.”
~ Neale Donald Walsch ~

My first thought was WOW! The next thought I was in Awe at the insight. I wasn’t quite sure what I felt about it at first other that it spoke to me on a deep level. I sticky noted it on my Mac and read it again several times relishing each word as I read it, questioning its truthfulness. It was at this point that one of my favorite quotes of all time came rushing back to me.

“We have, in fact, two kinds of morality side by side: one which we preach but do not practice and another which we practice but seldom preach”
~ Bertrand Russell ~

It was at this very moment that I saw the TRUTH in Mr. Walsch’s statement. Bertrand had expressed it quite well years earlier but Walsch simplified the reality of Russell’s statement by addressing Morality itself. Sometimes simplicity can hold a golden acorn of truth that the soul instantly recognizes when it gazes upon it.

The thing about “Morality” is that it all comes down to making judgments. A friend of mine has recently made a post on her blog about the subject of making judgments, (you can see it here), although generally I agree with her notion to “Judge On” I’m not so sure it’s that simplistic in reality. I think there are possibly differing types of judgments some are beneficial for our very survival as individuals and a society as a whole while others are much more counterproductive and/or even destructive to society or an individual IMHO.

I agree with my friend when it comes to making Judgments based on survival. We make judgment calls everyday all day long. We start with what we are going to wear and eat, to ending a relationship because it’s not in our best interest to continue it any further. We also make many of our judgments based on our experience that we have so far gained on our journey thru this life. If someone betrays us we usually make the judgment call to remove that person from our lives for good reason, we happen to enjoy our sanity. Sometimes we come across individuals that behave in a manor similar to those who have wronged us in the past and thusly chose to leave them to their own demise and dismiss them, never to give them the time of day. These are all sound judgments that are beneficial to us as individuals and to not make these judgments calls is to be stagnated in infancy IMHO. So, to Survival judgments I cheer Babble and second the anthem of “Judge On”.

For me an example of a judgment that IMHO is destructive to society as a whole is when we judge groups of individuals based on shallow premises such as their religious beliefs (polygamy) or sexual preference (homosexuality). And as a society we then see fit to deem them unworthy of ALL their constitutional rights. We relinquish them to the status of separate but not equal which destroys the effort of society as a whole to embrace and respect diversity in all its aspects of humanity, IMHO. These judgments are more often than not made out of fear and ignorance and thusly are irrational at their very core. To make any judgment from this mire of muck serves no purpose than that of tyrannical leaders and those that would see fit to remove us from our own freedoms. This to me is the most destructive aspect of these judgments. After all, “Morality” is nothing more than our personal subjective ideals that change with time based upon judgments that we make on our journey thru life. To deem ones personal, “Morality” must be followed by all is to deem all others incompetent and in need of another individuals tyrannical parentage. Rather insulting if you ask me, just saying.

Maybe after a few years and hopefully more insight I’ll see things differently but for now I remain conflicted.

On a side note: I spent about an hour Sunday night in the ER again due to chest pain. It wasn't a heart attack and they still don't know what it was. Luckily it happened at home this time and Hubby rushed me to the ER. Then today one of the bulbs on our big TV blew so now hubby and me have no TV. When it rains it pours. I stongly suggest lynching " Murphey". LOL