Today I faced the one thing every mother of a son dread’s to hear. You see Shaggy the man-child is 17 ½ now and he’s not the girl crazy type even though he’s interested in girls he knows that he’s not ready for a “Serious Relationship” so he leaves them be. I can respect that. Actually, sometimes I wish I could have been that smart.
Well, this afternoon I receive a phone call from Shaggy and it went something like this.
- “Hey mom?”
- “ Hi Honey! What ya need?”
- “ I was wondering if it would be alright to go over to…. (Insert girl’s name here) house?”
Instantly a concerto of chirping crickets begins to play!
I’m totally dumb founded at this point. I’m sitting there unable to think of anything to say. Anyone that knows me can testify what a miracle this moment was cause my blowhole was shut. LOL
Finally, I gained some use of my vocal chords and was able to ask, “ What?” Yeah that was all I could muster. Pathetic really. I’ve been reduced to a mediocre single word response and at that point my 1 yr old niece could out talk me even if it is in G.I. grunts and chipmunk. LOL
Shaggy repeated his question and I regained some composure and slowly the word “OK” left my lips.
The conversation continued at this point and for some unknown reason I began channeling Billy Murray from Caddy Shack!
- “ Where does she live?”
- “ She lives at *Bleep, Bleep* Street. It’s only a few blocks from our house.”
- “ Whatcha gonna be doin’?” Stretching out each word as it releases from my vocal chords.
- “ Oh we’re going to play some games and stuff.”
Ok at this point I’m totally flipping out inside. My heart starts racing and I keep forgetting to breathe! OK, Breathe! I just got to Breathe! What the hell does he mean by STUFF? It better not be the stuff he shouldn’t be doing! What if this girl is fast and tries to Kiss my baby!!!!
OMGS! He is his father’s son maybe STUFF means the same thing as his father’s, “ we were just watching TV.”
Oh Sweet Jesus that’s how I ended up with Shaggy in the first place! Make mental note to remove all the evil TV’s from the house ASAP!
All of a sudden a voice rips through my total internal meltdown.
- “What time should I come home mom?
Think fast! Come on think fast! You want him to think you’re cool with it but you don’t want to give them to much time cause they are teens and they sometimes do STUFF! OMGS! What do I say? What time? OH geez, oh geez!
- “ How about 5 o’clock? This way you can get the dishes done while I’m starting supper.” Faking my way through it so I seem calm.
- “ Ok mom. Bye!” and CLICK went the receiver.
I’m on the verge of hysterics at this point. I call my Darling Hubby right away at work. I’m so shocked I just can’t absorb it! This was right out of left field. I was completely caught off guard.
I can tell from the get go my Hubby don’t share my mommy sentiments as I can hear him trying not to laugh at me. He’s happy, excited and relieved that his son is FINALLY at a girl’s house. Needless to say that didn’t help much. I get off the phone and I turn into a big puddle of Mama mud. MY Baby! He’s my baby! I’m not ready for this! OMGS! What if she starts calling the house? Then what am I going to do? With each thought another tear would trail down my cheek.
This has totally messed me up and they’re just friends at this point. Heaven help me when he starts to actually “DATE”! Heaven help my Husband when my first baby bird finally leaves the nest. He’ll be calling Shaggy to move in with him. LOL
I know that this is normal and a healthy part of growing up but DAMNIT! Why can’t kids at least come with warning lights so you know when these things are coming? This way you can at least brace your self so you are better able to deal with it. And why can’t they stay little till their Carter’s wear out?
Being a Parent is a bittersweet journey and as Mother’s I think it is even more so. These are our BABIES! Only Mom’s can understand this cause it’s different for Fathers. Not that it doesn’t hurt any less for Dads it just isn’t the same. We spend our lives from the moment of conception nurturing, caring for and loving them. Even though intellectually I know that this job never stops it still is hard to watch them grow up and not need me so much anymore.
It’s amazing watching your children grow and blossom into the people they will be but as they get older you can’t help but to still want to scoop them up in your arms and protect them like when they were wee ones. The problem is you can’t and at some point you have to let them spread their glorious butterfly wings. This is truly the bitter sweetness of parenthood cause this is when the relationship between the child and parent changes into a new and wonderful stage. It requires us as parents to resist the urge to step in and carry them, to not scoop them up and hold them in our laps and to realize that we will no longer be able to protect them like we used to.
Please pass the tissues!
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